Confessing A Crush?
Dating can be hard. Admitting your feelings can be harder. But hopefully, we have some advice that can help.
If you were to search, “How to come out to my crush” or anything around that phrase, you’ll find a long list of articles written on the subject. After all, people love love and we all want to know how to get some. But here’s the thing, a real and true connection with another human being typically doesn’t happen fast. It takes time and consistent effort. This should also be how we see and approach things like talking about romantic feelings.
First picture this. You have someone that you like in a romantic way. Whether it be a man, a woman, or someone non-binary doesn’t matter. You have known this person for say, a couple of months. You’ve seen them here and there and want to confess that you’re feeling romantic feelings. But the problem is, coming out with a crush confession out of nowhere can come off as overwhelming and creepy. While yes, it could work in some situations and circumstances, it isn’t the best route you could take.
Dating isn’t about hiding feelings for someone and secretly hoping they feel the same. And it certainly isn’t about forcing your feelings on others. Instead, dating is about gradually getting to know someone, connecting with them, and finding out if you have emotional and physical compatibility.
The Best Approach
So then what do you do if you think you might like someone? Start to gradually hang out with them one-on-one. You don’t even have to use the “date” word. Instead, ask that person out for a drink, a meal, or an event. Just find a way to meet up with that on a more personal and intimate fashion. Then slowly and gradually get to know each other.
The trick is, you should “confess” your feelings after you are already seeing each other a bit. Develop a relationship with someone before throwing feelings their way. Working gradually is the key here. After all, if you haven’t spent enough time with that person to really know them, you can’t actually love them. Instead, you love the idea of them.
Ultimately, a crush is a selfish act. It typically happens at the start of knowing someone. It comes from a personal space of wanting to feel love for a person and often is without truly knowing that other person. That’s why they call it a crush, after all. Because at the end of the day, it often ends with you, your feelings, and your fantasies losing out. It’s in the next phase of getting to know someone that you start to understand, like, and love them.
All of this is to say, take your time. You do not need to confess feelings. Instead, show them by making an effort to hang out with the person, getting to know the person, and eventually dating them. Most good things in life take time and effort. From a successful career to falling in love. Trust us, the gradual game is the way to go.