10 Things Happy Gay Couples Never Do

Being happy in a relationship takes work

Achieving happiness in a relationship takes more than positive thinking. It requires a daily focused effort to put healthy relationship habits into good practice.

Let me assure you – this is not always easy.

That said, there are certain behaviors that can sabotage a couple’s prospects. Here’s 10 things happy gay couples never do.

1. They don’t compare themselves to others

Gay couples that are strong love each other as is. They realize comparing their relationship to others in caustic (and unfair) and leaves them feeling less secure about their relationship.

The next time you are with another same sex couple and see desirable qualities in one of the duo, remain confident and don't second guess your choice.

Remember, the grass isn't always greener on the other side.

2. They don’t bad mouth their man to friends

Happy gay couples know that it's smart not to involve others in their relationship. They speak directly to each other when an issue arises.

It's OK to occasionally seek out advice, but don't take it as an opportunity to bash your partner. When you bad mouth your man to friends, you attract negative energy to your love life.

3. They don’t play victim

Gay couples who are happy take responsibility for their feelings and role in the relationship. They avoid blaming each other for their problems.

They are direct in asking for what they need instead of engaging in self-pity or scapegoating each other.

4. They don’t criticize

Couples that survive the long term look for the good in each other. That's not to say they don't argue. They do. But when they are upset, they discuss their issues in a respectful way.

Happy gay couples know that mean, toxic criticism erodes the foundation of their relationship and ruptures bonding.

If your partner is doing things you don't like, focus on why it's annoying you and learn how to talk to him in a sensitive way.

5. They don’t neglect finances

To remain solid, couples know that financial stress on their relationship should be avoided. They stay in communication about their money situation and don’t conceal spending habits.

If you are a gay couple that doesn’t feel comfortable discussing finances, know that not talking about it is a ticking time bomb.

6. They don’t prove their love on Facebook

Happy gay couples that are truly in love with one another have nothing to prove. This means they don’t take to Facebook to share every bit of minutia about their love life.

While the occasional photograph is OK, real couples don’t plaster social media with their pics for the sole purpose of gaining “Likes”.

7. They don't cling to roles

Even if a gay couple prefers certain roles in the bedroom, happy duos aren't rigid about them. They remain flexible about new possibilities – even when it's not their preference.

So, if your boyfriend typically is top but occasionally wants to switch, you need to be open to at least trying.

8. They don’t make nagging a habit

Stable couples in love nurture their relationship. They encourage and affirm while finding ways to support each other. They coach and motivate as opposed to nagging, which usually backfires.

If your husband is out of work, don’t hound him to “get a job”. Instead, offer your compassion – even if frustrated.

After all, that’s your man. Your genuine care and love will do a lot to motivate positive movement.

9. They don’t mirror straight relationships

Gay relationships are different. Part of this is because LGBTQ couples often lack a healthy blueprint for the “how do we do this” question.

Finding role models isn’t easy. One thing is for certain; happy gay couples don’t try to mirror heteronormative straight relationships. That’s because, in many ways, they differ.

10. They don’t need drugs for intimacy

There’s nothing wrong with having occasional fun. But for happy couples, they know continually using drugs while having sexy time is faux intimacy.

Instead, they recognize that not every sexual experience will produce fireworks. They also know that intimacy comes in different forms that have nothing to do with sex.